Giving

She looks battle weary. Her face bearing the scars of addiction, her head bowed. She walks the line of cars, the blessing of a busy intersection and a red light.  Quickly she walks, hoping some kindness might be extended to her- a meal, a few dollars, an encouraging word. This day I can offer only a hello and a prayer. She cries and grabs my hands, her gloves stiff with cold. “In Jesus name,” she agrees. “I know He’s going to take care of me” she says. The light has changed, the cars behind  honk with impatience, we say quick goodbyes. Each day I pray, that her absence means she’s found a warm  and safe place to lay her head, that she is bravely fighting her demons, that healing and recovery are in her view.

This woman is just one of  thousands of homeless men, women and children  in Baltimore. The need is heartbreaking and overwhelming but there are individuals and organizations on the front line meeting these needs everyday. If you are considering where to give this holiday season, consider adopting a woman or family (mother & children) at Marian House. They are truly helping women move from dependence to independence.

Writers Speak

A wise woman told me, “Writers speak and speakers write.”

I have a tormented relationship with public speaking. Tremoring, sweaty hands, a flip flopping stomach and a shaky voice don’t equal good times for me. Speech Communications was the first class in which I ever received a C. I often say I can write it better than I can say it. But over the years, my written thoughts have led to invitations to publicly speak. *Insert alarmed face* And more recently, the causes and issues I’m passionate about have sparked ideas and opened doors that require me to write as well as speak. So, compelled to grow, I registered for a voluntary series of public speaking workshops offered at my job. The first workshop was downright uncomfortable at times (including a 30 second exercise of maintaining uninterrupted eye contact with a stranger *insert alarmed face again*). But I imagine the process is like stretching; it’s a bit uncomfortable at first,especially if your muscles are cold and stiff, but once your muscles begin to warm and lengthen, the release and relief are invigorating. So here’s to growth and stretching out of comfort zones.

Perspective…

Photo by Ivan Bertolazzi on Pexels.com

I write because I have a passion for the written word. I have a brain overflowing with stories and ideas that must be recorded and shared. I exercise my pen and my keyboard for my freedom. The flow of my words therapeutic, a divine intervention. Published or unpublished, hundreds of readers or just one; my gift is not diminished, my call no less important.

Why do you write? Re-evaluate. Refocus. And let’s write on, friends!

It’s a Celebration!

It’s the first day of school!!!! YAY!!!!! My son excitedly began his first day as a first grader. It was so cool to watch him catching up with his friends. Here’s to a great year and hopefully a more consistent writing schedule.

I am also so excited for some writer friends (and “friends in my head”:-)) as they see their dream come closer to reality…PUBLISHED! I’ll share more later as release parties and book signing dates near, I can’t wait to promote their “babies”.  And it motivates me to keep putting in the time and the work, to keep writing. Persistence will pay off!

Just checked off another great book on my ‘To Read’ list and a review is on the way. Stay tuned!

Focus and Discouragement

It’s been a while since my last post so excuse me if I ramble a bit…

On Focus-
I’ve always considered myself a pretty focused person. I’m a planner, I make lists, devise methods and get the job done. I ‘m all about working now so you can rest later. No taking breaks, no scenic routes- in the words of Mater just “Git ‘er done!” But now when it comes to writing I feel like a scatter brain. So many ideas-poems, plots, dialogue, commentary- some of them make it to paper while others are like a flash of the brain and then forever gone (those days I wish I carried a recorder). I sometimes wonder why I can’t be one of those writers with sudden urgent inspiration and produce a novel in like two weeks. No really, I realize that the craft of writing is a practice of diligent, deliberate action, a commitment.  NPR (National Public Radio) recently did an interesting segment on “harmful” reads for aspiring writers. Not because the books are bad but because they’re so well written and loved, that their style might invite imitation (which we know is the highest form of flattery). It’s a point well taken. I remember reading Alice Walker’s The Color Purple and attempting to write a story through a series of “Dear God” diary entries. Recently I read a classic christian fiction novel by Francine Rivers and while I have always been inspired by her style, I was especially taken with the story. A story that nudges me to focus on an unfinished manuscript, just a few pages abandoned in my files. I’m inclined to take a second look.

On Discouragement-
Ever heard the saying “Jack of all trades but master of none”? I think that sentiment can be applied when one says “yes” one time too many, trying to do it all yet sufficiently accomplishing nothing. I’m disappointed I won’t be walking with the LLS Team in Training in the Iron Girl Half Marathon this week as I’d planned (remember that post and my little fundraising widget?). First I was unable to make crucial group training sessions, then I had difficulty fundraising, didn’t meet my goal and it pretty much went downhill from there. Could I have done more? Yes I know I could have. Fundraising was the one thing I dreaded and I probably subconsciously sabotaged myself. I chalk it up to poor planning and unrealistic expectations, I’ve lived and learned.
Then there’s the writer’s discouragement. You know when you wonder who if anyone is reading your stuff, when you’ve received another one of those nice form letters saying, “Thanks but no thanks.” You begin to wonder if your words are impacting anyone or anything. Am I delusional? In the past this discouragement would become full fledge deflation, I would just stash the pen & notebook on a shelf. But this time around the passion is undeniable and I’m determined to push forward. I’ve settled within myself that if I have an audience of just one, it’s one person whose life has been touched in, I hope, a positive way. I’ve been challenged to determine what defines success for me. Is it being published by a traditional publisher? Is it self publishing? Having a web presence? I’m still sorting out the answers to those questions but I’m encouraged and I’m motivated.

Challenges can make you bitter or better. I choose better. Let’s write on, friends. Write on!

The Voice

…No, not the show but the way a writer communicates with their audience. I’ve learned that very often the voice one speaks with and the voice one writes in can be totally different… or they can be one and the same. Personally, the way I write is not the way I speak. Mainly b/c I tend to be reserved and most of my dialogue happens in my head (I’m not crazy, really). I’m having a conversation or discussion and the dialogue in my head is like a page long but what comes out of my mouth could fill maybe half an index card. I find it a lot easier to convey my thoughts in writing rather than verbally. I’m a letter writer and email lover, on the journey from my brain to my mouth sometimes things seem to get lost in translation. That zinger doesn’t zing, my 50 reasons become 2 and frankly sometimes I just self-censor.  Am I going to tell someone they’re self centered and needy? Probably not. But I might write it (and I have, not in those words exactly but I think the sentiment was conveyed). Still developing my voice and evaluating the censors…

Friday Tantrums

Another Friday, another weekend! And I’m googling “temper tantrums one year olds.” I can’t remember if my son had tantrums at this age but my one year old bundle of sugar, spice and everything nice  has been quirking out. When she can’t commandeer her brother’s toys or get into the corner with all those plugs and cords, she goes into tantrum mode- scream, cry, fall to the floor and kick. Am I distressed? No. A bit amused? Yes. And a lot curious as I watch this little personality take form.

Today’s Prompt: (another from the Writing Resolutions workshop)
Write a break up scene using only dialogue (1 min). Then write the same break up scene describing only setting (1 min).

“Um, I think we need to take a step back.”
“Why!?”
“I don’t know, I just need some space.”
“Well if it’s space you need, I can give you space, give you time to yourself. We don’t need to break up for that!”
“No, I just need time, time to figure out what I really want.”
“So you don’t want to be with me! Is that what you’re saying? Have I made your life so miserable that you  just can’t wait to get away from me?
“You know that’s not it! That’s not what I’m saying. I…”
“You what? What are you saying!? I don’t get this. Where is this coming from?”

They sat in the small convertible overlooking the city. It was too cold to let the top down, but he had lowered the window filling the car with the biting winter air. The muscles of his face were tense as he massaged his temples and stared out the window. She gripped the steering wheel and bit her lip as she watched him.

Can I just say…

I love PBS Kids! My son has been friends with Elmo, Bert, Ernie and Curious George since he was a wee toddler (yes, I am one of those TV moms- I say whatever keeps you sane and the kids entertained). I tip my hat to Sesame Street for helping him learn the ABC’s and 123’s that set the foundation for the reading and writing he does everyday. Who knows, he may take the published journey one day and credit his imaginative tales to his PBS pals. Today’s post is brought to you by the letter “A”, the number “2”, and PBS Kids…the soundtrack of a peaceful morning.

TGIF

Hey, what do you know, I’ve posted twice in one week!  So I found another great site for writers (and readers), the Burnside Writers Collective. It’s a great collection of blogs, essays, articles and what’s even better, they want writers! They welcome and encourage writers to submit their work. So it’s nice to know that I have somewhere I can submit some of the pieces quickly filling my hard drive with a real potential for publication and a greater audience. WooHoo!

Today’s prompt:
Do a 3 minute free write based on this metaphor: “a galaxy of longing”

The sweet smell of lavender awakened her senses and released the dull gnawing void. She yearned for the only thing she so desperately wanted but constantly eluded her. Career, money, and success no longer mattered. What she wanted, what she needed, was to give life. A galaxy of longing breached by that first  gaze into her child’s eyes.